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There’s a lot of urgency everywhere in the world today, lots of fears about getting it wrong, missing out, not getting what you want, losing what you’ve got and being left behind.  It's easy to get sucked into comparing ourselves to other people, regretting key moments in the past and worrying about the future.

Focusing on what you don’t want to experience is not a good idea.  It just brings you more of the same.  What you focus on is what you get more of in your life! 

What can you do not to get sucked into the fear, doubt and disbelief that’s everywhere around you, the feeling of being incredibly stressed?  It’s about unplugging from the way most people do it.  Unplugging from what magazines, the news, talk shows and lots of people say you should and should not be doing, which means giving up on your dreams and goals.

Even the people that love you and want to give you the best possible advice are operating out of their own biases, beliefs, and fears, and can easily sabotage your success if you ignore your own inner knowing, if you allow yourself to be swayed from your initial inspiration that really lit you up, that you knew was the way forward.

So if you have a new seedling of an idea, do not share it with anyone unless you are absolutely 110% sure that they will support you, cheer you on, have your back and keep your secret safe until your great idea is a sturdy tree.

Find ways to support listening to your own knowing, that still small voice inside that can be easily muffled by all the busyness in your life.  Find ways to get your head clear, to let go of daily stress and deeply breathe.  Meditation. Yoga. Hiking, Skiing. Swimming. Biking. Running.  Meandering through nature. Enjoying the full moon. Walking in the brisk night air. Lying on the beach.  Painting. Drawing. Writing. Journaling.  Building something. Clearing out the old – giving away, throwing out or selling everything that you no longer need or use.  Relaxing with a friend.  Being alone and enjoying it.

Find ways to nod your head and smile in all the right places and then follow your heart. Sometimes, it’s not worth making a point or having a prolonged or heated discussion with someone who just doesn’t get you, who wants to push their views onto you.

Gather people around you who understand you and get your vision, who care about and support you without needing anything back in return; gather people who are your tribe, people who have your back as much as you have theirs; people you can count on when the waters are rough; people who will tell it like it is while always holding the ideal of all you can be, the clearest, brightest version of you.

Practice being a witness to the stress of others, to the wound up, there’s not enough time, it’s too hard, I’m not going to make it, playing out in the world.  Be in the world but not part of the urgency in the world. Don’t judge it. Accept people and situations and circumstances as they are and make a new path for yourself and for others to follow; a path that is calmer, more productive and supportive, more in alignment with who you are choosing to be.

Unplugging from the urgency, stress and fear that is all around is not a one-off thing; it’s a daily endeavor. You are swimming upstream. If you stop or forget for a day, you will be swept back into the old.

It’s not easy being different. It’s not easy being the eye, that calm quiet center in the midst of everything that is happening in your world.  Anything worth having, calm assurance, being able to handle what is in your in tray with grace, ease and flow, is worth fighting for.

If you’re ready to unplug, find support and systems to guide you step by step of the way into a new way of being, one that supports your heartfelt success, one that's in alignment with your vision and ideals and goals.

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Protecting Purpose and Vision

Do you protect your new goals and projects, your inspirations, and ideas, from outside contamination?

As attorneys and professionals grow into leadership roles, they often discover that success depends not only on technical expertise, but also on the ability to communicate wisely and navigate important conversations and negotiations with clarity, steadiness, and sound judgment.

Their new goals, projects, inspirations, and ideas are seedlings.

Their new goals, projects, inspirations, and ideas are seedlings. They’ve just planted them in rich fertile soil and watered them.

They are barely sprouting up above the ground.  They are young and fragile, easy to trample and destroy.

Most people don’t have our best interests at heart.  They would sooner see us fail because our success makes them feel bad about themselves.  Even the people we love, the people who are closest to our heart can, consciously or unconsciously, have mixed motives.

If we want to succeed, we must not share our goals, projects, inspirations, and ideas -- especially before we’ve got them fully grounded and self-sustaining -- with anyone but those we absolutely and wholeheartedly trust. 

Again, sometimes we think we can trust our secrets with close family members and friends, when we can’t.  If our gut says ‘no’, listen.  It might not speak loudly, but we will feel a little nagging feeling or slightly uncomfortable.  Our inner knowing doesn’t shout, it whispers. Listen.

Sometimes it’s best to tell no one rather than risk a negative projection or reaction, which can be camouflaged as ‘just looking out for your best interests’ or ‘playing the devil’s advocate’ and can fill us with doubt.  And doubt is poison. It can easily destroy what we’ve started.

 

Once our seedling takes root and is a sturdy young tree, once our tree is able to weather challenging conditions and is able to not only survive but thrive, then sharing is a different story. We use our common sense and intuition to decide when the time is right.

 

“You don’t know my family or best friend", people tell me.  Maybe not. But people will try to sabotage our success for all kinds of reasons.  Maybe it makes them feel bad about themselves, shining a bright light on how unhappy or stuck they feel in their lives.  Maybe they are afraid that you will no longer need them, that you will move away or distance yourself once success lights up your life.

 

So, let's protect our seedlings from all negative thoughts, projections and influences, and err on the side of caution. Let's trust our intuition and be discerning. Ler's nurture and love our seedlings, knowing and visualizing that they are now magnificent, strong, and sturdy trees.

 

It feels like we are facing a technology disaster everywhere.

Don’t get me wrong, I am so grateful for the ease and flow of communicating that cell phones and the internet have given us.  I am just wondering if it is numbing you and I to the beauty of life and what’s really going on in the world because we are addicted to getting and receiving messages.  Everywhere I go, people are looking down at their cell phones, not interacting with each other, even when walking down the street.

It can’t be good for business. People do business with people that they like and trust, and that means getting to know one other, face-to-face interaction. We need human contact; it helps us to feel connected and part of life; it helps us to feel belonging and give us a sense of purpose.

So, here’s my challenge.  Let me know your experience.

Give your friends, colleagues, and staff your undivided attention when you are with them. Listen to what they have to say. Put your cell phone away. Focus on them, learning, absorbing, and enjoying the conversation.

People like people who listen to them. People like people who understand them, who get them and what they’re about.  Listening is good for business, good for your personal and social life.

When your clients or customers feel seen, understood, and heard, they are more likely to stick around for the long haul.  When the people you love and care about know that they can count on you to listen and work things out together or just be fully present in the moment, having fun, that adds a new dimension to your life and theirs, and that’s priceless.

Tools & Topics | Insights & Inspiration

Designed for leaders who value wisdom, strength, and inner calm

Professionals, Executives & Partners 

Professional Jewels for Success

Leadership and Negotiation Insights for Leaders Who Inspire Clarity, Confidence, and Calm Assurance.

These reflections explore themes of leadership development, communication skills, negotiation, and professional resilience — insights designed to support professionals and attorneys who want to lead with clarity, compassion, and thoughtful strength.

Please click on the Article 

 

Growth Mindset

Being Successful: Bringing Everything Back to Self

Know Your Why-What Combo

Meaningful Symbols for Your Enterprise

Where’s Elmo: Discovering & Knowing Our Why

The Why, How & What of Business Success

Releasing Imposture Syndrome: A New Way Forward

 

Financial Freedom

Superstar Marketing & the Dick Van Dyke Show

Manipulation is Killing Us

 

Life Mastery

The Joy of Being Your Own Purpose Expert

The Road Less Traveled: Is It Calling to You?

Having a Burning Desire for Success

Meditation: If Not Now, When?

Are You Ready to Unplug?

Protect Your Inspiration & Goals from Contamination

When Technologies Are Not Good for Business

 

Positivity & Resilience

Why Some Law Firm Leaders Are Trusted Instantly—And Others Aren’t

Emotional Intelligence at Work in High-Pressure Conversations

The Benefits of Heartfelt Coaching Presence

Communication for Success

Your Checklist for Success

Keep Going After the Initial Thrill is Gone

Drop the Kryptonite: 2 Keys to Reaching Your Goals

Team Building: Throw a Success Party

4 Keys to Feeling Success

A Rarely Mentioned Golden Key to Attracting Clients

Tap Into a New Client Pool

Marketing On Your Own Terms: 6 Keys for Success

Setting & Maintaining Appropriate Boundaries

 

Self-Improvement

Releasing Stress: 5 Keys to Support Your Success

Take Your Stress Down a Notch:  2 Golden Keys

 

Team Building & Success

How to Navigate Difficult Conversations in the Firm

Why 3–5 Year Associates Are Leaving  -- What We May Not Be Saying Out Loud

What Makes a Team Effective & Stellar

Take Your Team Leadership Skills Up a Notch: 3 Keys

Run a Great Team Building Meeting: Keys to Success

 

Transformational Leadership

When the Firm Moves From a Hands-Off Culture to One Where People Stay, Grow, and Do the Best Work of Their Careers

The Negotiation You're Not Thinking About (And Why It May Be the Most Important One in your Firm)

Retaining Top Talent in Law Firms: A More Complete View 

What Actually Drives Client Retention in Law Firms

The Communication Habits of Trusted Leaders

Faith & Inspiring Others

The Strength of Leading From the Heart

The Importance of Being a Coachable Leader

Leading with Integrity: The Foxhole Test

6 Keys to Creating Psychological Safety at Work

Upgrade Your Leadership Style: 3 Keys to Success

4 Habits That Hold You Back

Lessons I Learned From Traveling Overseas

Delegate Like a Superhero

 

Spiritual Jewels for Success: Soulful Reflections for Leaders 

I Am Spirit Having a Human Experience

I Choose to Love & Love I Will

I Flood My Heart with Gratitude, Appreciation & Humility

I Choose Clarity & Understanding

I Am Attuned to Unity & Harmony

Mistakes Are Opportunities to Learn & Grow

I Flood My Heart with Love – I Am Worthy of Love

I Take Life In & Turn It Into Love

 

Personal Jewels for Success:

Practical Wisdom to Strengthen Confidence, Resilience, and Joy:  Guiding Leaders to Experience Life with Calm Assurance  &  Be Loving Kindness in Action

Enjoy the Holidays & Beyond

Worthiness is a Choice

Choosing Gratitude as a State of Being

Our Emergency Tool Kit

Loving Our Bodies & Eating Right

Lessons I Learned from Hobbes

Meditation & Mindfulness

The Power of Vulnerability

The Benefits of Saying ‘No’ to Gossip

We Are Never Too Old

Tiny Homes & Van Life

A Simple Discovery

Let Go of Anxiety & Stress: Breathe

Dealing with the Opinions of Others

 

Coaching Jewels for Success

Coaching tools and insights for leaders who want to communicate clearly, inspire growth, and lead with heart.

What Makes a Good Coach?

Part 1: Coaching Presence

Part 2: No Judgment

Part 3: Offering Comments, Ideas & Inspirations

Part 4: Active & Empathic Listening

Part 5: Loving Comfort

Part 6: Loving the Truth & Biases

 

Work-Life Harmony

Mindfulness: 6 Simple Tools to Feel Calm & Relaxed

Making Space for Timeouts

The Magic Elixir of Exercise

The Joy of Prioritizing Your Values

The Art of Saying No

Learning to Be Love in Action

Introducing Feeling is Healing

Time Management & Minimizing Physical Distractions

Time Management & Digital Distractions

Time Management & Work Priorities

The Joy of Scheduled Breaks

Gratitude

Recalibrate to Kindness & Love

Breathe

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